Convicts’ DP, Director and Video Editor, Sharkey Weinberg, hit the 27-year mark today. Sharing his day of birth with the likes of Joni Mitchell, David Guetta and Lorde, you’d be forgiven for thinking Sharkey also has the voice of an angel and musical talent to burn. Alas, he doesn’t, though he is one of the greatest Rhode Island exports ever to have graced the Convicts’ office. For this reason, we sat down with Sharkey to ask some of the hard-hitting questions about life, aging, and advice for 24-year-old Sharkey.

CONVICTS

When you woke up this morning, what thoughts initially went through your brain?

SHARKEY WEINBERG

I woke up and I saw that it was a really cloudless blue sky and I thought, that’s really nice weather for my birthday. Then I rode my bike to work.

CONVICTS

Favorite birthday memories?

SHARKEY WEINBERG

I always liked waking up when I was younger. My parents would have out a few presents and breakfast.

CONVICTS

Let’s get to the hard questions. Are birthdays bullshit?

SHARKEY WEINBERG

No, I don’t think so. I think birthdays are a cool day because we inadvertently spend a lot of time celebrating ourselves and it’s a nice time to be ok saying, “Hey I’m a person and I contribute and this is the day I was born and we should celebrate me.”. I think there’s something healthy about that.

CONVICTS

What if you’re a scourge on humanity?

SHARKEY WEINBERG

Well if you’re a scourge on humanity then you get the birthday pass to be a piece of shit on your birthday. We do two things in this culture: We love talking about ourselves and we love thinking that it’s not ok to talk about ourselves so it’s a nice day where those two things that cause some cognitive dissonance align and you get to celebrate your birthday.

CONVICTS

So, what would you tell Sharkey from three years ago?

SHARKEY WEINBERG

Oh man, I would tell 24-year-old Sharkey to maybe smoke a little less pot?

CONVICTS

That doesn’t sound like a safe recommendation.

SHARKEY WEINBERG

I would say don’t stop all at once but maybe… think about it?

CONVICTS

Do you think 24-year-old Sharkey would be receptive to this advice?

SHARKEY WEINBERG

No, he would be mad. I would have to be wearing something futuristic, there would have to be a cloud of steam.

CONVICTS

Maybe a technological eye patch?

SHARKEY WEINBERG

Yes. I would tell him to do as you are. You’re good. Keep walking forward and as long as you keep working and you keep trying things will fall into place.

CONVICTS

What is Sharkey in the future doing on his birthday?

SHARKEY WEINBERG

I think my 35th birthday is going to be the best, I will be on a boat. A nice classy yacht, with my best friends. I’ve just completed a film that I’m super into.

CONVICTS

What would 27-year-old Sharkey tell 27-year-old Sharkey?

SHARKEY WEINBERG

Step it up a bit and at the same time chill out. Step it up a bit work-wise and chill out socially.

CONVICTS

Who would win in a fight? 30, 27, or 24-year-old Sharkey?

CONVICTS

30 is going to win.