This afternoon, the collective buzz of our office phones had everyone prepping, psycho-spiritually, for the abstract pain of reading an Amber or Silver Alert. Instead, perhaps less immediately sad, but more depressing overall, was the Presidential Alert text system making its presence known. Just in case we’re in danger and Donald needs to let us know. If this were Federal Alert system, it would be dystopian, but possess a less downright fascist air about it. No: this is a Presidential Alert.

More, probably, to strike fear in the hearts of Americans in different ways. Watch out, bad people are everywhere. Or: watch out, bad people, we’re everywhere.

And tell you what, if the goal was to scare us, the Presidential Alerts sure did.

The Donald’s got our inboxes at his whim, presumably, right near the nuclear codes.

Don’t know many things scarier.