Words by Cameron Higgins
Well, your and my and everyone’s NCAA bracket is busted sideways. True, March Madness is an excellent ride for college basketball fans, bookies, and the sports consuming masses. It’s drama is sort of unparalleled…except we know what’s going to happen. One team will win, and 64 will lose.
However, there’s an even sweeter Sweet Sixteen kicking off tonight. This competition will pit Frosty’s against McFlurry’s, burgers against tacos. That’s right: Fast Food March Madness is kicking off tonight with sixteen entrants. Unlike the NCAA Tournament, the Fast Food Tournament starts with sixteen teams because there aren’t sixty-four worthy national fast food chains. It’s an elite event that takes place at the same time as the March Madness games. So you don’t miss out on any of the basketball, CONVICTS will provide you a post-game summary on each of the matchups over the next week.
Start filling out your brackets.
Wendy’s (on account of their spicy chicken dankness and Bojangles’s regional ineligibility)
Taco Bell (on account of the functional burger meat filling the entirety of their menu items)
Time to Tighten Up
Words by Brittany Conrad Newsflash: Summer’s sneaking up on you ladies and gentlemen. The dog days of summer are approaching. ...
CONVICTS’ Inaugural Anzac Day Bake-Off
Late last night, the CONVICTS’ staff found itself wrist deep in flour, spice, and coconut. Today, the weary employees of ...